TWZ FAQ

Q: Is it difficult to email from the Baja?

A: Every little town has a business called, largo distancia, which is a place where long distance calls are placed. They charge about $2/min for calls to the USA.

In the larger towns, there are Internet providers, that function exactly like providers do in the US.

Q: Do you have to worry about drinking the water?

A: The entire Baja is situated over a huge aquifer much like that of southern California. For the most part the water is safe to drink, but bottled water is still very popular. Most of my friends prefer not to drink the public water, but I seem to have no problem with it. It must be my hearty intestinal bugs.

Q: Do you worry about the police?

A: They are my biggest worry. Drive around long enough in Mexico and one will eventually have to deal with them. They look do look menacing, but I think it is mostly bluff. If one is stopped and threatened with a violación, it is my modis operandi to wait them out. Despite their dour demeanor, they do not want to take you to the station and mess with all that paper work. They would much rather accept the "mordido"- the little bite. If you wait them out they are usually satisfied with issuing a warning. But not always, especially near the end of the month when the payment for the big screen tv is due. Depending on the situation, sometimes it is advised to give in with a small donation, allowing you to go about your business.

Q: Do you worry about getting eaten by a shark?

A: Ever since the Japanese have been allowed to indiscriminately kill the sea life in the Sea of Cortez, sharks have become all but extinct. There is the occasional schooling hammerhead, but when frolicking in the ocean, stepping on a sea urchin poses a much more immediate threat. It is hard to imagine how fabulous the fishing use to be, until you sit and listen to the old fishermen reminisce.

Q: Do you really believe that anyone actually cares about you driving around, god knows where, with a stupid dog?

A: First of all, Zelda is not stupid. She knows one trick, a couple dozen commands, has excellent taste in music, and in a pinch can take over the wheel while I quickly retreat to the back of the van to get a beer out of the cooler.

Regarding the merit of my endeavor, its undeniable success speaks for itself.

Q: Where will the next installment of TWZ take place?

A: It is my hope that Zelda and I will circumdrive around Australia. I am currently talking Big Money with serious sponsors. It is well known have no problem shilling for large multi-national banks, oil companies, timber harvesters, mining operations, and/or advertising firms. Interested parties are invited to respond